I need to promise to myself

I will take care of myself ...
I'm sorry I worry and my life never seems to be in order and she doesn't know half the things i'm worried about. But i'm sorry that I lashed out on her for my bad mood. Maybe i should just try to be like melle so she doesn't always knoow what's bothering me gawd
I think I ry to at least healthy while in school But obvioulsy I fail
I do not want to eat food and i will not eat food instead i will drink water and eat lots of gum. I'll go back to do a little bit of exercise before
sigh i hate food but hate it even more that i love it.
p.s i love silk milk gonna try to grow my hair out

Nooo not Like Me.......But I like my Water on the Moon

I love hanging out with Mish, but I hope not too much of me rubs off on her or we just hangs out with me too much that she knows me too well. I mean I try not to talk about how I think I look fat and wish I was skinny too much otherwise my friends will most likely just say that I dont' need to, but I do or else I will let myself go. It's not that important but it's still upsetting that I don't fit into all xs as well only some depending on the store. I know my family knows how I don't like to eat alot and I call myself fat or my excuse for not wanting to eat certain food is because I'll get fat and what not.
It's true I'm very conscious about that subject. I truelly love/ hate food. I'm asian and I notice how much rice I used to eat and sometimes do so since middle school I've trained myself to limit my intake of rice and breads and carbs. But I still love french baguette and sticky rice(not dry plz).
It's all in good fun though that Michelle has been pointing out how I'm afraid to get fat. Which I really try not to complain about around my friends. . . .............does this mean I've gotten that much fatter?? I know I've gained weight since summer and I hate it but aw mannnn
I have very strange eating habits and it all depends on my surroundings so most likely (this is horrible) I won't eat that much for thanksgiving with family until I'm home(not at grandpas) so yeah I'll still control myself somehow. I have a problem with and no one really knows what I went through in the summer with food and up til now kind of -__-
I"m going to go run today for a bit after I start my effin TOK hw stupid teacher assigns an essay due next time right before break whatever
Did you know that there could be water on the moon?? it's a whole new moon lol I want to see that movie with my best friend
update: oh and I'll try to post more outfits if i wasnt' so tired when i got home I would ...